The “Someday” Trap: Let’s Live Now
Every Tuesday, I have a “Little Chat with Shannon” live stream in the 52 Cues Community. This topic was on my mind recently.
The Magnificent Force of Hope
Ah, the elusive idea of "someday." It holds such promise, doesn't it? The notion that what lies around the corner will be the key to our happiness and fulfillment. Our inner beings, our souls, our spirits—call them what you will—love to hope. Sure, they also enjoy a good dose of despair, as we all do when we embark on our late-night Reddit doom scrolling adventures. Life can feel pretty miserable at times. But hope is a magnificent force.
Hope is what keeps us going, day after day. We hope that tomorrow will be better than today. And there's something beautifully creative about hope, isn't there? As creators by nature, we constantly seek improvement, forever dreaming of a brighter future, and hope is our companion on the journey.
“Someday, my prince will come…”
But here's the catch, my friends. Sometimes, we take this hope thing a tad too far.
"When this happens, I'll be happy," or "When that happens, I'll have arrived." Sound familiar? We create a narrative where our lives will finally commence when X, Y, or Z occurs. It's a sneaky little cycle we've fallen into.
My dad, Larry Thomas
And now here we are in the post-COVID era. COVID, the time when things got particularly weird for me—and for the whole world. During that period, my dream job as a creative director at a church became a rollercoaster of uncertainties. "Are we meeting live? Recorded music or live? Do we need a mid-week Facebook Live music service? Now we’re back, but how many singers can we have without causing a catastrophe?" Anxiety was the flavor of the day. On top of that, I experienced several big personal losses, including the passing of my father and bidding farewell to that beloved dream job.
So, I took a breath—or a year, to be honest. Bless Dave Kropf, a man of many talents and a master of music composition—and an amazing husband. I indulged in drawing for days on end. I did about 700 pictures and a couple hundred really detailed mandalas. I rose a couple thousand levels in my iPad games. It was a much-needed pause, facilitated by Dave's encouragement to savor life in the present moment.
It was difficult, and painful, and healthy. I worked through my stuff, but realized that I kept thinking about “whatever comes next.” "When this happens, I'll be happy," or "When that happens, I'll have arrived."
Sound familiar?
We create a narrative where our lives will finally commence when X, Y, or Z occurs. It's a sneaky little cycle we've fallen into. In my year of healing, I was constantly thinking that the “next thing” was just around the corner—but it wasn’t. I was deferring life while I waited for life to happen. I had to decide what I wanted.
Break the Cycle of Constantly Waiting for Tomorrow
The idea of constantly deferring happiness, fulfillment, or love until tomorrow can be quite the trap. After all, tomorrow never truly arrives—it's perpetually today. Our only reality is the here and now.
Of course, I remain an ardent advocate for hope, for looking forward to the future. But we mustn't lose sight of the present moment. Today is the only day we have any control over. It's the starting point for all the wonderful things that await us tomorrow. So, let's cast aside this notion that our lives will begin when the perfect conditions align. Let’s embrace the art of mindful living.
Be mindful of this day, this very moment that you find yourself in. Be grateful for what you have, where you are, and the fact that you're alive and kicking on the right side of the grass (not beneath it). Remember that the choices and actions we make today shape the outcomes of tomorrow. Let's bid farewell to the "someday" mindset and revel in the beauty of the present.
Wishing you an awe-inspiring week!
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